“I don’t remember pastels being part of your five-a-day!” Janet shouted to her five year old not-so-secretly sucking the art tools in the pool house. He removed one from his mouth quickly.
“Oh what am I going to do Cara? Here I am, a vibrant, beautiful woman (or so Cosmo tells me) and I get landed with a no-good ex-husband who’s mid-life crisised his way to a new life with his secretary whilst I’m stuck in a seaside holiday camp with a toddler guzzling coloured wax.”
Janet looked miserably at her oldest friend. “Oi! I’m at this holiday camp too! Besides, you are a vibrant, beautiful woman. Look, that lifeguard hasn’t stopped looking at you since we arrived at the pool.” Cara nodded in the direction of the handsome man looking in their direction. “He’s probably just trying to figure out where I’ve left my Zimmer frame!” Janet laughed.
Suddenly, to their surprise he got down from his tower and sauntered towards them. Janet and Cara looked on in surprise. “Maybe there’s an age maximum,” Janet whispered half-seriously. “Excuse me miss (“miss” was a good start Janet thought), I was wondering if you were busy?” the Adonis-like creature said in a sexy Irish accent. Flustered, Janet avoided his gaze. “Um, no I’m not,” she said hoping. “I didn’t think so because your son’s eating oil pastels in the pool house.”
“Right,” Janet said deflated. The cheek of him! She would’ve given anything have him swallowed up right there and then. “Good. It helps if people actually look after their kids,” he chastised before returning to his tower. Cara looked at Janet open-mouthed. “He so has the hots for you!” she squealed.
Oh dear, Janet thought, this is going to be one long week away.
By Dejeniera Pygott